No one promised us that parenting would be easy, however, as many of us know, parenting is also filled with joy, loving and warm, chocolaty moments. Nevertheless, even as we want to develop independence in our children and nurture them so they are able to make their own decisions, this is not something we do alone. From the age of approximately 5 years old, we start to share our responsibilities with regard to our children’s development with their school, which includes their teachers and peers. So it makes sense that we need to be very careful about how we choose the right school, as this decision will affect who they become. This article is applicable regardless of the age of your child and the level of school you are looking at, from nursery or pre-school, to primary and high school.

Not so long ago (and yes, I am aware that this still happens now), your child’s school was determined by either where you lived, as your child was zoned for certain schools, or by where you as parents went to school, making use of that old-boy / girl network. However, it is really important that you think about a couple of factors before enrolling your child at your old school or simply placing them at the school down the road because it’s convenient.

These factors need to be considered before you even step outside your house and start looking at schools. For example:

• Who is your child? What are his*interests and strengths?
• What are your morals and values that you need the school to nurture and support? More specifically, what are your views on the schools …
• Academic focus – are you looking for a school that demands excellence in the classroom? Some schools are highly pressured academically and put all the focus on achieving good results, sometimes to the point of excluding the development of other areas (such as those listed below) that ensure the development of a well-rounded personality.
• Community service or involvement in the community - does the school participate or encourage this? Is it important to you if they do or don’t?
• Religion – what are your religious beliefs and values and does the school uphold them? Perhaps it is important to you that the child is able to attend chapel or prayers at school. It is possible that it’s important to you that your child does not have to attend any religious services at their school. Please think about this carefully as this is a very important area.
• Cultural activities – what are your thoughts in terms of developing the cultural aspects or is this not important in your family?
• Sports facilities – how big a role do you want sports to play in your child’s life? How big a role will your child want it to play? Do you want your child to develop sporting prowess – is this more important than their academic development? Remember, there are some children who excel at sports but only just keep their head above water academically, due to specific learning difficulties. Is this your child? It may be too early for you to answer this question but keep it in mind as your child gets older.
• Discipline, morals and values – what are yours and how do you want the school to handle these issues?

It is important to be realistic about what you want and what is important to you, your family and your child before you start looking at schools, as it is of no benefit to your child if he does not fit into his new school and you need to repeatedly move him until the right placement is made. Once you’ve answered these questions then it’s time to start looking at schools. Where do you even begin?

Firstly, look into the different teaching environments, for example, Montessori, Waldorf, private, government, specific language schools (such as the German School), etc. Make sure you thoroughly investigate the different philosophies and understand how they will work with your child. Investigate the different types of schools to determine a possible fit with your child. What about the size of the school? While there are certain advantages in selecting a small school, there could be disadvantages too, such as limited facilities, no choice of teachers if your child has specific difficulties with one of his teachers or classes, etc.

The following tips will hopefully assist you in your decision making process.

• Look into written material about the school. Magazines, newspapers and the Internet offer a wealth of information about the schools.
• Visit the schools you are interested in and make sure you take a tour and peep in through classroom windows. Remember to try and ‘see’ your child in the school while you look around. Do the children look happy? Are the teachers yelling? Is the environment overly strict or too permissive – in your opinion?
• Ask your child’s current teacher what they know about the school. This is obviously only an option if your child is already in a school. Please don’t do make or break decisions purely on other people’s opinions if you haven’t visited the schools yet.
• Ask to meet your child’s potential teacher and have a look at the class when you go to visit, although this will only be possible once you have narrowed your choices down to a few schools.
• Find out how high the staff turnover is. This is a really important consideration as children need a certain amount of stability and it is also possible that many teachers leaving is indicative of specific problems within the school.
• What is offered for children who are struggling? I know that people don’t want to think their child has a problem at school but the reality is many of them do – in fact, some figures suggest it is as many as 25% of school going children. What is available at the school in terms of extra assistance and therapists?
• How much communication is there with the parents and how is this done? Meeting, talks, newsletters? How much parental involvement is encouraged? Are you able to pop in for a chat? Can you walk your child to his classroom (sounds strange but I know of school where parents are encouraged to not be on the premises, other than the car park).
• Look at what the school offers to develop your child’s strengths and interests. What facilities do they have?
• Chat to parents in the car park and find out what their feelings are. Please be careful about this, as you don’t (I hope) want to become a ‘car park mom’ – but this is definitely a resource that has its uses.
• Trust your gut when talking to people and looking around the school– if it doesn’t feel right, it possibly isn’t!
• Once your child is in the school, talk to them and keep a check on their feelings about the place. Please don’t dismiss their concerns out of hand. It is entirely possible that you were shown a different side to the teacher than your child needs to deal with on a daily basis.

Finally, if you are uncertain, have your child assessed. This can help you resolve a number of issues, such as subject choices, sports versus academic focus, nurturing versus academically driven, school ready, etc. However, it will not necessarily make the choice for you, if you are down to 2 or 3 schools and cannot make up your mind!!

*I’m using ‘him’ for the sake of convenience throughout this piece, but obviously all this information applies to ‘her’ as well.